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The Daily Groan
Small-batch groans from @FriendsofIrony - May 5, 2026
New Today
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Ranking Dog & Zoo Visit Dad Jokes
Posted May 5 |
12i Tonight's Dinner Table Kit
Ready-to-use. Theme this week: animals.
Lead with this one a it sets the tone:
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Pause after the setup, then deliver the punchline completely straight-faced.
Try this one at dinner:
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
Pause after the setup, then deliver the punchline completely straight-faced.
Start a Family Talk
After the groans settle a go deeper. One question, real conversation.
For little kids
If you could add one rule to our family, what would it be?
If the table goes quiet: "Why that one?"
For teens
What's something you've changed your mind about recently?
If the table goes quiet: "What made you rethink it?"
For couples
What's one thing about our life together that you didn't expect?
If the table goes quiet: "Is that a good surprise or a complicated one?"
Bible Table Talk
Proverbs 17:22, ESV
"A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."
A small laugh will not fix every hard thing, but it can soften animals enough for people to talk honestly. Use the joke as the doorway, then notice who needs encouragement, patience, or a lighter load tonight.
- Where did we see joy show up today, even in a small way?
- Who around us could use encouragement this week?
- What is one way we can bring a lighter spirit into tomorrow?
Dad Approved Picks
Stuff a dad would actually use. Or at least display near the BBQ.
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Dad Jokes Book
500+ groan-worthy setups and punchlines. Ideal for the dinner table or any captive audience. View on Amazon a |
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What Do You Meme? Family Edition
Meme card game the whole family can play. Dad jokes optional but encouraged. View on Amazon a |
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Dad Jokes Trophy
Official recognition for the best (worst) jokes in the room. Desk display required. View on Amazon a |
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Best Dad Coffee Mug
For the dad who wears the title with irony. Holds coffee. Holds dignity. View on Amazon a |
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